Gallus or Mince?

"People have only one way to be. Buy, don’t rent. Never marry a man you wouldn’t want to be divorced from. Don’t cover a couch with anything that isn’t more or less beige. Don’t buy anything that is 100 percent wool even if it seems to be very soft and not particularly itchy when you try it on in the store. You can’t be friends with people who call after 11 p.m. The world’s greatest babysitter burns out after two and a half years. The empty nest is underrated. If the shoe doesn’t fit in the shoe store, it’s never going to fit. When your children are teenagers, it’s important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. Back up your files. Over insure everything. There’s no point in making piecrust from scratch. If friends ask you to be their child’s guardian in case they die in a plane crash, you can say no."

"Number of peer reviewed articles dealing with climate change published in scientific journals during the last ten years: 928. Percentage of articles in doubt as to the cause of global warming: 0%. Number of articles in the popular press about global warming in the last fourteen years: 636. Percentage of articles in doubt as to the cause of global warming: 53%."

"The heartwarming and unforgettable story of a family in the making and the wondrously neurotic dog that taught them what really matters in life."

" “To the Prime Minister of Muggles. Urgent we meet. Kindly respond immediately. Sincerely, Fudge.”

The man in the painting looked inquiringly at the Prime Minister. “Er,” said the Prime Minister, “listen... Its not a very good time for me ... I’m waiting for a telephone call, you see... from the President of —”

“That can be rearranged,” said the portrait at once. The Prime Minister’s heart sank. He had been afraid of that.

“But I really was rather hoping to speak —”

“We shall arrange for the President to forget to call. He will telephone tomorrow night instead,” said the little man. “Kindly respond immediately to Mr. Fudge.”

“I... oh ... very well,” said the Prime Minister weakly. “Yes, I’ll see Fudge.”

He hurried back to his desk, straightening his tie as he went. He had barely resumed his seat, and arranged his face into what he hoped was a relaxed and unfazed expression, when bright green flames burst into life in the empty grate beneath his marble mantelpiece. He watched, trying not to betray a flicker of surprise or alarm, as a portly man appeared within the flames, spinning as fast as a top. Seconds later, he had climbed out onto a rather fine antique rug, brushing ash from the sleeves of his long pin-striped cloak, a lime-green bowler hat in his hand.

“Ah... Prime Minister,” said Cornelius Fudge, striding forward with his hand outstretched. "Good to see you again."

"In Kabul, fighting kites was a little like going to war. As with any war, you had to ready yourself for battle..."

"Mr Langdon," the message began in a fearful whisper. "Do not react to this message. Just listen calmly. You are in danger right now. Follow my directions very closely."